Catalyst Alternative Private High School Boulder, CO

I Want to be Amazing

I want to be amazing
I want to love so deeply
that even the birds don’t know what to sing
I want to be crazy
but most of all, I want to be ok with being crazy
I want to look out into the world
and shout “Here I am!”
I want to lay my heart out
exposed for all to see
without a single part to hide
Because I want to be safe
and I want to know that I can wake up every single day
and stare at myself in the mirror and smile
I’m done hiding
I’m done shying away from every obstacle
because it is only an obstacle until I see it as an opportunity
And I want to take every opportunity I can get
Because I want to always be able to look back
and say with confidence that I have no regrets
I want to look you in the eyes and say that I love you

But most of all, I want to mean it
and how can I look into someone else’s eyes
until I learn the power of what my eyes can see
I want to know what it means to hurt
so that I can appreciate what it means to love
I want to feel my heart break
so that I know exactly what I am doing before I go messing with someone else’s
and then I want to feel my heart heal
and let it beat stronger than it ever did before
I want to be true
because nothing is worth doing unless it comes from a place of honesty and integrity
And I want to share this all
because none of this is worth it
if I can’t let my fingers glow as I reach my hand out to yours
So I want to be amazing
but I want to do it on my own terms
So maybe, just maybe
All I want to do is be
— A. E., Catalyst Student 2010

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